So since my vacation alot has happened. I am actually going on dates with Ben now. He's changed so much but not 180. The things that annoyed me before are gone. It's almost like he took notes and worked on it. I know it sounds like I'm this perfect person and he was a royal eff up. He wasn't a royal eff-up but I have worked VERY hard to be the type of person that I was during when we were dating and I cannot say I was at fault for anything. I'm not trying to place blame either, but if I had a concern I would voice it. If I had an annoyance I'd let him know in a tactful way. Now I really can't say I have anything to complain about. He's alot more calm. Alot more thoughtful as far as thinking before reacting. And he has always been but I guess I didn't notice, he REALLY is considerate.
The one thing I went wrong I think was I didn't truly know whom he was prior to us dating the first time. We didn't go on dates. Get to really know the ins and outs of each other. And focus on what we want and don't want in a relationship prior to dating. One day I decided we should date and we did. We had to figure all that stuff out while we were dating. Sometimes that works for people. Didn't work for us. I think we've been going on dates since April and it's been great. No pressure. Not exclusive yet. He really came through though last Thursday I have to admit. I was so impressed. I needed help and he was there. That has really put him over. And I get constant correspondence from him on a daily basis. I can honestly say aside from my family and friends the feeling of having someone want me is so...cool. Not just want me for sex or to say they have someone. But truly genuinely want me. I look at him totally different now than I did the first time around.
So that's going on. And I am proactively looking to change my work situation. It's not horrible at work it's just not me anymore. I have a couple avenues that I won't talk about yet for fear I'll jinx it, but I am definitely putting my nose to the grindstone. Very excited for some of the prospects. Again we shall see.
Lastly I am ever so slowly digging myself out of financial ruin LOL This will be HUGE because I can now enjoy life a lil. FINALLY! Get back to fun me :)