Kick Ass2

"Kick Ass2" picks up with Dave (hottie Aaron Taylor-Johnson) having left his responsibilities to be a regular teen while Mindy (Chloe Grace Moretz) as Hit Girl cannot think/do anything but defend the city. They switch places in the middle of the movie as Mindy is forced to become a normal 15 year old and Dave can't stop helping others in need. Dave even forming a "crew" of vigilantes/superheroes. Chris (Christopher Mintz aka McLovin) picks up his evil patterns to avenge his father and forms his own army of evil. I don't want to give away any spoilers, but it becomes a fight to the death for everyone involved.

My two problems with the film were: 1) this film is WILDLY gratuitous language and nudity throughout the entire movie unlike the first. 2) Aaron Taylor-Johnson's butt was distracting.  

I know how the second one sounds but EVERY shot was of his butt when he was in the costume I kid you not. Based on the first movie I brought my 10 year old nephew and was MORTIFIED at how much nudity, butt shots, and language was rampid throughout the movie. I almost walked him out but kept hoping it would get better. The story was okay but a little bit predictable. I just couldn't get past the nudity and language to enjoy the movie.

Honestly compared to the first I give this two stars. I don't even think I would've enjoyed it had I went alone. It was okay but not great like the first. 

Oblivion

 

This was probably the most confusing movie I've ever seen. Was watching it with my sister, brother-in-law and nephew. My brother-in-law had to look up the movie on Wikipedia to explain it to me. I can only give it one star because the special effects were a amazing. The storyline was absolute and utter dribble. I didn't get it; nor did I care halfway through.

The Butler

Aside from the woman behind me dangling her bare feet across the seat, the talking women nearby, and the cell phone that stayed lit most of the time this was the most important movie of my life.

Growing up in Agawam, MA I always wondered why I never knew about Black History. In high school we were mentioned in Social Studies during the Boston Tea Party when Crispus Attucks died. I was going to the library to learn more about it when during my work-study (I was in Business Class and my last period was devoted to working in the Principal's Office doing clerical duties including going to every classroom passing out attendance for the day) something traumatized me. As I walked into Mr. Zamburello's Social Studies class to hand him attends someone called me Crispus Attucks outloud. I turned around and Mr. Zamburello was laughing with the students. I left and told no one, but I also became ashamed of my history. I never looked up anything about Black people again. I also became very uncomfortable around other Black people as when I entered college I was "Uncle Tom." I didn't know who he was so I just kept to myself, but my friend Devonna and I hung out. She was the prettiest black girl before Halle Berry. And so nice. People called her "white" even though she was as dark if not darker than me. Why? Because like me she was educated and carried herself with respect. We became fast friends and still are to this day. It wasn't till I was out of college I started to actually research more about my Black history. I know a few things, but I'm more of a visual person (says the writer).

Enter Danny Strong. Danny Strong played a supporting role in Joss Wheadon's TV series "Buffy the Vampire Slayer." Jonathan was a chubby nerd who wanted a girlfriend. I didn't think much of Danny Strong after the show was cancelled. Then his name popped up a couple of years ago. He won the Primetime Emmy for writing the made-for-tv-movie "Game Change." Really? Jonathan from "Buffy?" And then Lee Daniels (director of "Precious") directed his movie called "The Butler." Now Danny Strong has my attention.

"The Butler" isn't a story about a black man serving White House Presidents. Oh no it's much more. It's a story about our history...Black history. This movie touched on EVERY major Black story in America even Sidney Poitier. The only thing they left out was Dorothy Dandridge. But seriously I think they hit on that with Sidney.

I am calling this now as this year's "Lincoln." In fact it almost feels like it picked up where "Lincoln" left off. Forrest WILL win his second Academy Award for Best Actor. Oprah will be nominated for Supporting Actress although she could be Lead. She steals every scene she's in even when she's being silent. Cuba Gooding Jr. and/or David Oyewolo will be nominated for Best Supporting Actor. The performances were amazing. Even James Marsden whom sounded very close to JFK. The only performance that left me uninspired was Minka Kelly as Jackie O...there were NO TEARS! Leighton Meister woulda been a better choice lookwise and actingwise. Talk about acting chops! But Lee Daniels and Danny Strong will win for directing and writing respectively too. 

Overall I give this movie ten stars out of five. It was amazingly perfect; everyone involved should be proud. If We're the Millers is my fave comedy of the year, "The Butler" is my fave drama of the year. AMAZING!

Elysium

Matt Damon stars in Neill Blomkamp's latest tale in the future (anyone remember megahit "District 9" starring Christian Bale look alike Sharlto Copley?). This time we are in 2154 Los Angeles, CA where Earth is ravaged with poverty and disease. There is no upper or middle class. No Benz or Bentleys. No beautiful people or miraculous cures. Those are saved for Elysium (a space habitat outside of Earth). As head of Defense at Elysium it is Jody Foster's job to keep out "vermin" along with her "secret weapon" Sharlto Copley (whom plays a bounty on Earth called Krono).

Even more physical than "The Bourne" series but not as emotional Matt nails it as "Max." There is a slight love story with his character and Alice Braga (niece of Sonia Braga), but it falls flat due to storyline and lack of chemistry. I don't want to reveal too much of the plot, but it's definitely an original smart movie. I just wish it was more emotional. Even "District 9" was emotional as the character was changing leaving behind his girlfriend. And the special effects are the real deal.

Worth seeing though I will admit. 4 stars out of 5.

Orange is the New Black

Everyone has been clamoring about 'Orange is the New Black' (Netflix original) so here's my review. Keep reading..

We're the Millers

I will say this I thought The Heat was the funniest movie of the summer. I truly did even over The Internship. I was wrong. "We're the Millers" was by far the funniest movie of the summer HANDS DOWN! I give this movie 5 out of 5 stars.

Not only was this movie original, but dare I see "She's Back!" Jennifer Aniston makes a huge return to comedy, but this time in movies. Her other movies were okay. "Along Came Polly" she was funny with Ben Stiller. "Bruce Almighty" as Jim Carrey's girlfriend. I personally liked her in the rom-com "He's Just Not That Into." But it seems like she's stuck in a "Rachel Green" rut. This movie breaks that.

The movie is about (the guy-next-door hottie) Jason Sudeikis being a pot drug dealer whom gets robbed trying to help virgin teen in his building Will Poulter and runaway Emma Roberts. The people rob him of his entire stash of pot and them some. His boss played by (the nerd hot) Ed Helms tells him he must go to Mexico, recover a "tiny bit" of pot and come back. Jason with no choice decides to create a family as border patrol would be less lax to search a family in an RV over a single man. He enlists his virgin neighbor teen, the runaway, and lastly his stripper neighbor whom he loathes/loves Jennifer Aniston. Together the Millers go on a hilarious journey from Denver Colorado to Mexico and back. OF COURSE it doesn't go smoothly and there are bumps along the way. You will guess some of what happens, but for the most part you won't. And the great thing about this movie the hilarious parts (truly funny where you cry, cringe, and cover your eyes) are not seen in the trailers.

The best part about the movie I have to say is Jason Sudeikis. Not just because I have a crush on him, but I think after this movie guys-next-door everywhere will get dates LoL He's got this "I know I can't beat you up and I've never been in a fight, but I will at least try to defend myself or the people I care about" attitude in the movie that's INSANELY sexy. Plus if anyone follows my posts you know how I like butts...he's got a nice one :) It's nothing like Henry Cavill's but (no pun intended) it's still nice.
 
If you want a laugh and to see Jennifer Aniston like you've never seen her before go see this movie. I promise you won't be disappointed...except for the belly ache you get from laughing. And stay during the credits some funny outtakes.

Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters

Logan Lerman is back as Percy Jackson in this latest installment of the live-action version of the classic Percy Jackson books. Being half-human/half-God (making him a DemiGod) he's at a Camp (think Hogwarts at Camp Crystal Lake) for other DemiGods. His father being Poseidon (aka Kevin Kidd aka "Owen Hunt" on Grey's Anatomy) he can control and be healed by water. His mission in this movie is to get the Golden Fleece as the protective invisible barrier around the Camp is weakened. The barrier was put up by the Gods after one of their children died. Her body was morphed into a Tree of Life so to speak and now the tree is poisoned and the barrier is weak.

Pretty awesome story right? Well mix in a Cyclops, the return of Luke (Hades' offspring) from the first movie, and the legend of Kronos and you have a rambunctious adventure for tweens. Personally I'd give it 4 out of 5 stars. I walked away very entertained EXCEPT for one part.

This isn't giving any plot points or spoilers away but one of the bad guys wants the Golden Fleece for himself to bring back Kronos and be on the bad side. Percy and friends want the Fleece to heal the girl and tree. Well instead of taking the Golden Fleece and leaving Percy and another character have a "tender moment" long enough for Kronos to rise. ANNOYING! I didn't mean to buy I pulled a Brenda from "Scary Movie" and yelled out "OH COME ON!" I was so annoyed and pissed. There were two other parts, but I don't wanna give anything else away. All in all seriously great movie. Stinks that this came AFTER all the other movies like it (Wrath of the Titans and Harry Potter) as it resembles them SO MUCH, but I know the Percy Jackson books were in existence before all of them.

Pacific Rim

Surprise movie like of the summer!

I wanted to hate this movie for so long. At first it seemed cool in the trailers, but closer to the release date I wasn't impressed. I put off seeing it since its premiere, but I wound up taking my 10 year old nephew to see it after another movie wasn't so great (check my review on The Wolverine); we both ended up liking it alot.

If you mesh "Battleship" with "Godzilla" you get the plot of this movie: Aliens have a portal  hidden in the Pacific Ocean for millions of years to travel from their world into ours. In this incarnation of the Aliens' plan almost all the countries on Earth band together creating Jaegers (2 person piloted robots) built to fight Kaiju (the alien monsters). Their plan today is to destroy the portal with the help of Jaegar pilots Charlie Hunnam and his brother. Mission goes horribly wrong and Charlie's brother is killed. The countries disband the Jaegar project head by Idris Elba's character making the Jaeger project now a rogue team. The countries decide to build walls that are easily broke by Kaiju. Idris once again enlists Charlie for Jaegar project whom has taken refugee in the wall buildings after his brother dies. Back in the game he meets Academy Award nominee Rinko Kikuchi, Idris' eager assistant who wants to do nothing more than co-pilot a Jaeger.

This movie has quirky characters like Kaiju enthusiast Charlie Day and cocky "True Blood" star Robert Kazinsky as well. Even though the story is nothing new the execution is! I loved this movie! It's dialogue was sharp; the fighting scenes were breathtaking; and the acting was spot on. del Toro fave Ron Perlman made a funny cameo as a Kaiju body parts black market dealer.

4 out of 5 stars. Trust me you will like this one.

The Wolverine

I want to first say I LOVE Hugh Jackman. His "Wolverine" is very enduring; that's why I'm THOROUGHLY confused by "The Wolverine"...literally.

I love the characters and villains, but the story was just too muddled for me. It picks up Present Day after the events in "X-Men: The Last Stand" as Wolverine has hallucinations of Jean Grey. Wolverine has taken solace in Japan; he flashes back to when he saved a Japanese soldier during the bombing of Nagaski, Japan in World War II. I don't want to spoil anything else, but it just gets a little confusing after that. It's less entertaining and more "a story to get us to the next."

This felt like "Kill Bill: Volume 2" alot of talking and little action. Some of the action was so unnecessary. And I think the new trend in action movies is "Family Guy's" Peter Griffin vs. Chicken when they go on and on and on and on. 

I give it 2 out of 5 stars.